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The Online Magazine FOR and ABOUT Southside Virginia

8/2/2014

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In This Issue

2010 Bridal Issue Cover
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Special Edition
2010 Southside Bridal Issue

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Bridal Marketplace
(List of Over 80 Vendors)
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Articles
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I Want To Grow Old With You
By Gert Slabach

Southside Brides
(Five Brides - Five Stories)

Professional Wedding Photography
(Getting the most from your Wedding Photos)
By William H. "Bill" Garrett

Wedding Event Planning Tips
(Advice for Planning YOUR Event)
By John C. Carver

Tips From the Pros
(Advice from Bridal Vendors)

Married on a Budget
(What we spent in 1982)
By Brenda Hunter Snead

Insuring Your Jewelry
(Sponsored Information)
By Brandon Scearce

Wedding Jitters
(Wedding Jokes & Humor?)

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Columns

Southside Gardener
(Monthly "To Do List")
By William H. McCaleb

Ask Bubba - Advice
(Parody)
Bubba goes to Mars...
and Venus

 

Departments

Editor's Page
(State Park closures - Hey brother can you spare a dime?)
V & B Comics
(Verrnack & Blupirk)
Love is an Alien Emotion

Farm & Ag Info

Farmers Markets Listing (FMs in or near SSVA)

Venture Outdoors 2010 (PDF - Info/Flyer)

NRCS, USDA Funding for High Tunnels
(PDF - 63.4KB)


Festivals & Events
Feb - April Events

Press Releases

 

Past Issues

Past Issues are available from June 2008 through the current issue.
Select the desired issue from the drop-down box below.

 


Wedding Jitters


The Funny Side of Marriage, Weddings
and Relationships in General

Wedding Jokes, Quotes and Cartoons

 

jitĚter - (j`t`ur)
intr.v. jitĚtered, jitĚterĚing, jitĚters
   1. To be nervous or uneasy; fidget.
   2. To make small quick jumpy movements.
   3.Laughing uncontrollably at the collection of wedding jokes, quotes and cartoons in the Discover Southside Bridal Edition.

n.
   1. A jittering movement; a tic.
   2. jitters A fit of nervousness. Often used with the.
   3.A collection of wedding jokes and cartoons in the Discover Southside Bridal Edition.

Synonyms & Related Words

pl.n. Slang cold feet -
Timidity that prevents the continuation of a course of action;
"I was going to marry him, but I read Wedding Jitters in Discover Southside and got cold feet"


Funny Wedding Cake Topper


Walking Down the Aisle

   While walking down the aisle, there are 3 words on a woman's mind: "Aisle, Alter, Hymn!"


Wedding Escorts

   A little girl was at a wedding with her parents. After the wedding, she asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What do you mean?"responded her mother. "Well, she went down the aisle with one man and came back with another."


Why A Bride Wears White

   A little girl at a wedding asked, "Mommy, why do brides always wear white?" The mom replied, "Because they're happy, dear."

   Halfway through the wedding the girl whispered, "Mommy, if brides wear white because they're happy, then why do men wear black?"



Wedding Vows

   During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer: "Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I'm supposed to promise to love, honor, obey and be faithful to her forever, I'd appreciate it if you'd just leave that part out.

   He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied.

   On the day of the wedding, when it came time for the grooms vows, the pastor looked the young man in the eye and said: "Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?"

   The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, "Yes", then leaned toward the pastor and hissed: "I thought we had a deal!"

   The pastor put a $100 bill into the grooms hand and whispered: "She made me a better offer."


Early Marriage Proposals


Golden Wedding Anniversary

   A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their domestic tranquility had long been the talk of the town. A local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of their long and happy marriage.

   "Well, it dates back to our honeymoon," explained the man. "We visited the Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom on the canyon by pack mule. We hadn't gone too far when my wife's mule stumbled. My wife quietly said, 'That's once.'

   "We proceeded a little further and the mule stumbled again. Once more my wife quietly said, 'That's twice.'

   "We hadn't gone a half-mile when the mule stumbled the third time. My wife quietly removed a revolver from her pocket and shot the mule dead.

   "I started to protest over her treatment of the mule when she looked at me and quietly said, 'That's once'."


Newlywed Conversation

   "Dear, don't expect the first few meals to be great. It takes time to find the right restaurant."



Marriage Seminar

   While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication, Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor, "It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes." He addressed the man, "Can you name your wife's favorite flower?" Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's Pillsbury, isn't it?


WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE.

   Worn once by mistake. Call Stephanie. 555-1212



   If your wife laughs at your joke, it means you either have a good joke, or a good wife.


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wedding Vendor Index

Beauty Consultants / Cosmetics

Bras / Lingerie

Cakes

Catering

Catering Supplies

Cleaners

Event & Wedding Planners / Coordinators / Directors

Event Equipment Rentals & Supplies

Florists

Formal Wear

Framing and Art

Gifts

Gowns & Veils

Home Decor

Hotel/Motel and B & B's

Insurance & Financial

Jewelers

Limousine Services

Music and Entertainment

Photographers

Restaurants - Venues - Rental Locations

Salons & Stylists

Travel

Wigs and Hair Pieces

Window Treatments

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Discover Southside
PO Box 1061
South Boston, VA 24592
URL: http://www.discoversouthside.com
Copyright © 2008-11 Discover Southside

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